Bicycle Taxidermy Wall Display Bike Racks
/bicycle-taxidermy-bike-wall-34089.jpg "Bicycle Taxidermy Bike Wall Display Racks")
You might hunt elk and deer in the woods to taxidermy into prized wall art, but in Portland they make theirs out of saddles and handlebars hunted down in the hipster Goodwills. Home furnishings designer The Iron Roots hand-crafts this series of Bicycle Taxidermy bike wall display racks from a shop in - no surprise here - Portland, OR.
The functional, funky pieces of art are made from Oregon fir wood, a leather bicycle seat, and bull-style road handlebars. The animal head resemblance of the results is loose, but unmistakable, and would probably go over real well in the home of any two-wheeled hunter who regularly stalks and slays century rides and the daily commute.
The Longhorn Bicycle Taxidermy Wall Display Bike Rack
Modeled after the head of a Texas longhorn, this piece of Bicycle Taxidermy sees its glossy silver handlebars extending from the sides of a brown leather head with 6 rivets arcing along the top. It secures to the wall via its oval wood backing and a pair of 3-1/2" screws, which The Iron Roots says "bring unquestionable stability no matter what wall material you hang it on."
The American Buffalo Bicycle Taxidermy Wall Display Bike Rack
With a face a little wider and coloring a little deeper than the Longhorn, The Iron Roots shapes this bike rack after the American buffalo. It incorporates a real bike seat and handlebars, and can support any standard sized bicycle less space-consuming and more aesthetically pleasing storage.
The Albino Bicycle Taxidermy Wall Display Bike Rack
Ahhh. Susie Swanson from down the street had a white bicycle seat like this one when I was a kid. And silver handlebars with white grips and blue and purple tassels dangling from their ends. And prematurely large boobies. Ahhh.
The Albino Bicycle Taxidermy rack is also designed after the head of a Texas longhorn, and I just looked up if albino Texas longhorns really exist, and according to the Googs, no. They do not. Just one more way in which Bicycle Taxidermy is an utter farce of the real thing!
/vibrating-bicycle-seat-8731.jpg?mode=crop "Vibrating Bicycle Seat")
Vibrating Bicycle Seat
A heads up to politicians and city planners: stop wasting your money on bike lanes, tax incentives, and PSA campaigns. All you need do to persuade your constituents to trade in cars for bicycles on their morning commute...
The 100 MPH Bicycle
And by 100 MPH Bicycle, Donhou Cycles really means Bicycle That Has Peaked at 60 MPH on the Open Road but Could Theoretically Make It to 100. I'm not sure how that theory was developed. I think it's how fast frame builder...
ONDA Cycle
ONDA terms itself a recumbent stunt bike/trike that can also be used to commute to work. Commute to work? What am I, the imp from Game of Thrones? Cee Lo Green? I'm not willingly placing a 3-foot-high version of myself...
Turbospoke Bicycle Exhaust System
Hey kids, here's a surefire way to make your parents construct an advent calendar counting down the days until you go back to school next fall. The Turbospoke system, a battery-free, pedal-powered child's dream, fits...
Paravelo Flying Bicycle
While I know my life would be forever changed had I XploreAir's flying bicycle, the Paravelo, during my fuming battles with city gridlocks and local Department of Transportation personnel who were almost certainly collectively...
/cyclotron-spokeless-smart-47112.jpg?mode=crop "Cyclotron Spokeless Smart Bicycle")
Cyclotron Spokeless Smart Bicycle
For all the Sam Flynns out there who need more exercise, you'll soon be able to trade in your electric Light Cycles for pedal-powered Cyclotrons on your joyrides and daily commutes. The self-described "Future of Cycling"...
Bike Mine Exploding Anti-Theft Alarm
Bike Mine is a thing that makes you go boommm! At least if you're a dirty thief trying to make off with a dude's bicycle or motorcycle (or boat or jet ski if you live the kind of high rollin' life where that's a risk.)...
Bird of Prey Bicycle
I didn't think the foam helmets and seizure-inducing neon spandex could look any more ridiculous rolling down the road, yelling at cars to get out of their lane, and then cutting into traffic at will when it suits them...
Loopwheels - Integral Suspension Bike Wheels
People out there lucky in the sense that they know how to ride a bike but unlucky in the sense that doing so jars their spines and brains and generates great discomfort in the crotchal region, say hello to Loopwheels...
The $30,000 Lamborghini Bicycle
The 50th Anniversary Lamborghini Edition impec is the bike P. Diddy or Kanye West would buy if they took up cycling. Which is to say if they learned to ride a bicycle. Oh the comedy that would ensue the first time Puffy...
Big-O Stunt Skates
Despite their being shaped like big Os, I'm not sure about Big-O as a name for these stunt skates. I'm pretty sure if I were to try them, the words "Big O" would not be at the forefront of my mind. I'd call mine Big I...
Animated Bike Wheel Lights
MonkeyLectric upgrades its previous version of Monkey Light LED madness for bicycle tires with Monkey Light Pro, an installation of customized, downloaded graphics and animations that turn two wheels into two tickets...