Bob Ross Finger Puppet
Imagine the joy of owning a finger puppet of the man who taught us the joy of painting. That's a serious amount of joy. I got that joy, joy, joy, joy, down in my heart. Where? God, I'm in such a great mood thanks to this finger pup.
Furry Friend Bucket Hat
If the Cookie Monster had a baby with Barkley...or just, like, became a piece of hybrid merch at the hands of a Sesame Street fanatic...this Furry Friend Bucket Hat could easily be the result. Made with an abundance of...
You Is Fine Bears
Do you love her? Eh. Is she cute? Heh. She is way beyond cute, dude. Hot? HOT. Like... Hotter than Olivia Munn all tatted up and devouring a chili dog in a Xena costume? Uh... Basically every time I see her all I can...
Undead Teds - Your Bear, Zombified
Whoa. I thought the scariest thing I'd ever seen was a real live British boy who looks like Chucky, but Undead Teds have staged a coup and now reign supreme. Even if they don't have the same bone-chilling, soprano accent...
Beer Puppeteer - Human Puppet Drinking Game
The Beer Puppeteer is a Dutch drinking game. Yes, that's right. The same people who think it's a good idea to ride bicycles everywhere and eat herring also think it's a good idea to turn yourself into a human puppet...
Feisty Pets
These Feisty Pets are the perfect way to teach your kids about the true nature of animals. All cuddly puppy and squishy bear and magical unicorn at first sight, but get too close and...Rrrrrawwwrrr! Back the F off, son...
Life-Size Minecraft Creeper
Personally, I'd be opposed to cuddling with one of these Creeper SOBs, but maybe Minecraft fans who have better reconciled the differences between pixelated computer screen graphics and real life will appreciate the whimsy...
Blobfish Plush
Snuggle up with God's ugliest creature. It's true. The blobfish wins all the Most Horrific Beast on the Planet contests, and as I've previously mentioned here, I think it might be my curse to be reincarnated as one. Legend...
Things That Make You Go Awww
While cute 'n' cuddly 'n' precious isn't normally my jam around here, over the years I have found some products that are more awww-inspiring than awe-inspiring. I figured, for your guilty pleasure of the evening, I'd...
Giant Talking Chewbacca
Life-sized is still a few feet away, but this giant Chewbacca plush toy measures in at a formidable 24" tall x 15" wide. Which is probably bigger than the kid you're going to pretend you're buying him for. And when you...
R-Rated Talking Ted
Why do people always diss Mark Wahlberg? He makes such quality movies with filthy-mouthed talking teddy bears. And from forth the cinematic masterpiece that was that Ted comes the plush masterpiece that is this Ted. A...
Cute but Cantankerous: Animal Gifts with a Bite
None of the animals that made my cute but cantankerous animal gift list are dogs, but I think we can still talk in terms of bark versus bite when discussing just how ill-tempered and aggressive these selections are...
Randimals Stuffed Animals
Hark! It's a Hork! Randimals Stuffed Animals are huggable mashups of our finest furry, feathered, scaled, and cartilaginous friends. Above you see the Randimals Hork, one possible outcome of a horse mated with a shark...