Food & Drink

Dine Ink Pen Cap Utensils

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Too bad no one thought of this Dine Ink Pen Utensil Set 20 years ago when people still used pens to perform office tasks. Also too bad no one thought to name them Bite 'N' Write, which is far more memorable, clever, and...

Fruit Infuser Water Bottle

$39.99 Amazon »

People think I drink only Kool-Aid and sodie pop because I'm immature and unrefined, but really it's because water is such a yawn. I need the excitement and intrigue of carbonation and colors insulting to nature in my...

Electric Nut Butter Maker

$68.95 Amazon »

To illustrate what awaits future owners of a Nut Butter Maker (i.e., my mama), I have included photos of some of the pulverized-peanut-themed treats I would like to have made for me. From left to right, they include:...

HAPIfork - The Smart Fork

Discontinued

WARNING: Eating too fast leads to poor digestion and fatness. Well. HAPIfork sure has the Appeal to Fear propaganda technique down. Their marketing team must have studied under my grandma. That said, indigestion and fatness...

Trongs - Finger Food Utensils

$14.95 Amazon »

Obviously I like eating with my hands. It goes with the territory of being a man. Buuut...I really hate when BBQ and Buffalo wing sauce get under my fingernails and into the cuts I have from doing manly things with my...

Doctor Who TARDIS Mini Fridge

Discontinued

Ironically, the prevailing thought I have in looking at the photo of this TARDIS Mini Fridge with the door open is that it most definitely is not bigger on the inside. Look at all that crap stuffed in all willy-nilly...

Gummi Bear Flasks

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The best part about these Gummi Bear Flasks is their vendor description. First of all, due to Pack o' Gum Lighter copyright infringement issues I'm sure, they've been termed Boozie Bear Flasks. "Boozie" as in booze, as...

Musical Wine Glasses

The Germans. So precise. They even have to formulate and label the aural art of swirling one's finger 'round a wine glass. Not that I'm complaining in this case. After all, the 12 delineations on these Musical Wine Glasses...

Bytox Hangover Prevention Patch

Discontinued

Bytox Hangover Prevention Patch: Argument in Favor...

Beef Jerky Gun

$20.71 - $34.99 Amazon »

Which came first, the Weston Jerky Gun or the Sushi Bazooka? Squirted meat or squirted fish and rice? Conundrum, conundrum, we may never know. But, praise be to Zeus, like chickens and eggs, my stomach approves with fervor...

The iFlask

$24.95 iFlask »

Smokers, you've got your iStash. Drinkers, it's time to get your vice's piece of incognito Apple paraphernalia. In its ubiquitous and thereby discreet glory, the iPhone serves as the facade of subterfuge once again with...

Popinator Popcorn Launcher

Discontinued

The Popinator, a voice-activated device that launches a kernel of popcorn from its spout to your mouth at the sound of the word Pop!, may not be in production yet, but a once-over of the video makes it fairly clear that...

Red Cup Wine Glasses

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When drinking wine at home, does anyone really stick to the dainty 6-ounce pour rule? I certainly don't. Rednecking it up is pretty much what my entire life is all about, so a Red Cup Wine Glass not only makes drinking...

The Go Plate

$17.99 - $21.99 Amazon »

The day has come. Never again will we be forced to set down either our beers or our plates before administering a high five during tailgates, backyard BBQs, and the Journey featuring Special Guests Foreigner and Night...

PortaKeg - Portable Draft Beer

$649 PortaBeer »

With tailgating season upon us, and cold draft beer-drinking season about to hit its, oh, maybe 1 billionth month in a row, entrepreneurial brew-lovin' buds Albert, Mark, Todd, and Ray have hit Indiegogo with the PortaKeg...

Mad Scientist Iced Coffee Maker

$280 Amazon »

Coffee has become a culture so packed with rabid enthusiasts and discerning connoisseurs it's hard not to compare its advocates to the wine world's oenophiles, the auto world's car buffs, and the marijuana world's potheads*...

Spork Chops

$3.39 Perpetual Kid »

Two words: sensory overload. Not only do before me I see a fork, a spoon, and a pair of chopsticks all mish-mashed together into one phantasmagorical Asian food Uber Utensil, but I'm also feeling the sharp blow of brilliance...

Bacon Makin' Alarm Clock

While I'm not entirely sure how I feel about waking up to the sound of oinking, to the idea of waking up to the smell of sweet, smoky carnivore's candy, I say, "Hell. Yeeeahhh." Instructables savant Nelson Yepez has devised...

Hat Trick Breakfast Station

$74.29 Amazon »

Dorm rooms, office kitchenettes, and Manhattan apartments rejoice! The Hat Trick Breakfast Station combines three necessities of morningtime life--coffee, toast, and eggs--into one compact gadget no bigger than a standard...

LED Lightsaber Chopsticks

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Father-son lightsaber battles over Kung Pao chicken are about to get the LED treatment. Original lightsaber chopstick fabricator Kotobukiya continues its journey through their Galactic Republic of Replica Awesomeness...

Japanese Potato Chip Grabber

Say goodbye to greasy orange Cheetos fingers and any remaining illusions that humans are not the laziest animals on the planet. I thought the Remote Control Drink Float was the pinnacle of indolence, but next to Takara...

ToastaBags

$10.99 Amazon »

I know at least one person getting Boska Holland's ToastaBags for Father's Day. On the rare occasions my dad is forced to spearhead his own feedings, he likes to make grilled cheese sandwiches. And the way my dad makes...

3D Chocolate Printer

$4k Choc Edge »

Choc Creator is a revolutionary Voltron of Americans' two favorite things to do: screw around on the computer and eat. The first commercial 3D chocolate printer, Choc Creator Version 1, employs 10 mL syringes filled with...

Put a Head on Your Beer Mug

No matter the context, the topic of head always seems to be a controversial one. Does it enhance the experience or cheapen it? How much is too much? Do you let others know when they get a little bit stuck to their face?...