Sofa Beasts
- Canned Unicorn Meat - $16.28
- Goat Leg Pants - $34.20
- Unsettling Horse Head Mask - $24.36
- Tiger Print Lace Body Stocking - $19.05
- Cow Udder Cream - Smooooth - $20.76
Italian designer Rodolfo Rocchetti has turned three menacing beasts of the jungle into living room sofas: the tiger; the panther; and, most nightmarishly of all, the cow. Moooooo. Ugh, who decided cows were acceptable subjects for home decor? You know what cows, especially the fruity, kitschy ones, remind me of? Pee-wee Herman. And nights that Pee-wee Herman infiltrates my dreams, oh man. I wake up in a cold sweat, nauseated, frantically trying to rip from my brain that resonating guttural laugh and the words Mekka Lekka Hi Mekka Hiney Ho.
That said, taking in the closeup shots of the tiger and panther heads doesn't make me feel particularly keen about passing out on the couch watching, like, Supernatural, or any footage of present-day Kathleen Turner, and then waking up at 3 a.m. on one of those two Sofa Beasts either. I would, however, be amenable to seeing a video of that happening to someone else.