Miscellaneous

Japanese Shouting Vase

Stress-relieving pottery that doesn't require the presence of Patrick Swayze's ghost? Sign us up! The Shouting Vase is a bulbous fabrication of ABS resin that, when placed against your lips, absorbs and quiets the loudest...

Nest - The Learning Thermostat

Discontinued

Nest wears the hat triumvirate of temperature commander, energy conservationist, and significant other who actually listens and responds when you attempt to communicate with it. A thermostat that makes a diligent effort...

Urine Powered Batteries

Yes, $24 for six AAs is steep, but they hold their charge for up to 10 years, and, let's face it, you're never going to have trouble finding a couple mils of pee when they need a reboot. NoPoPos (No Pollution Power) are...

Financial Padding Package Cushioning

$15 The. »

All those turkeys who ask you to send them money? Relatives, charities, Billy Graham, the IRS. For less than $20, you can now ship each one of them thousands. And since these dead presidents double as packing material...

Nice Jewish Guys Calendar 2012

Discontinued

I don't think The Chippendales are in any danger, but the Nice Jewish Guys Calendar is certainly a good alternative. And you can display it proudly when Mom and Dad come over, or just make a quick switch before they arrive...

Where I've Been Scratch-Off Map

$24.99 Amazon »

What a fun way to track your world travels, or clever gift for your favorite ostentatious globetrotter with a mild gambling compulsion! One side of the 16.5" x 12" map is covered in a metallic patina that scratches off...

Happy to See You Naked Card

$4.50 55 Hi's »

Ladies, the answer to your age-old question, "What are you thinking about?" has materialized in greeting card format. 78% of the time you query your man about his internal musings, this is the perpetual, 14-word loop...

Girlfriend Pillow

$29.95 Amazon »

These pillows aren't new to the market, but then again, neither are the all-consuming feelings of loneliness and despair that overtake us as we try to fall asleep at night. So maybe it's time to check out a tried-and-true...

Moldable Plastic

$11.99 - $34.99 Amazon »

The next time you throw your hands to the sky and lament, "Argh! If only I had a doohickey with a flat lip on that end and a kind of hook-claw on the other that's small enough to fit in this slot here, and strong enough...

Word Jumble Wrapping Paper

Wrapping gifts is not fun. It sort of ruins the whole giving experience. Wordless wrapping paper strives to alleviate the stress associated with wrapping your gifts by tricking you into thinking it's a game. It's kind...

Cheeseburger Wrapping Paper

It's not what's on the inside that counts, it's what's on the outside. Right? The good folks at Gift Couture have captured that heart-felt sentiment beautifully with this cheeseburger wrapping paper. This mouth-watering...

Miss You Card

$4 Etsy »

Taken either as a threat or a thoughtful gesture depending on the intelligence and location of the recipient, this clever card is perfect for so many occasions. An ex-wife for instance could send this to her ex-husband...

Gift Complaint Form

I've often wondered why it is they have to ruin Christmas with gifts. Shouldn't we be paying more attention to Jesus than each other? And how long do we have to keep up the charade? The smiling. The fake excitement. The...

Slice Of Pizza Sleeping Bag

$200 Etsy »

A handmade, hand-dyed work of slumber and art that's stuffed with recycled quilts, lined with satin, and delivered to your door in 30 minutes or less. A scented model is currently in the works to increase the likelihood...

Facebook Reminder Birthday Card

Sold Out Etsy »

This is one of those "It's funny 'cause it's true" jokes, isn't it? However, there are two inherent problems with its marketability. 1) Any sender who would get the joke would never take the time to obtain a mailing address...

Back Alley Hooker Cards

$4.50 Etsy »

The greatest love of all, is... apparently a hooker's love for her crack. I would argue there might be a stronger sentiment, but I've never tried crack before. I have been a hooker for a short period of time in the 80s...

Lit Joint Birthday Candles

Sold Out Amazon »

Generally the joint comes first then the birthday cake gets shoveled down your gullet like you just got back from an unplanned 3 day excursion in the woods. Great novelty gift for all of your stoner friends or progressive...