Ruggie Floor Mat Alarm Clock
/ruggie-floor-mat-alarm-clock-26002.jpg "Ruggie Floor Mat Alarm Clock")
- Bruce Lee Knock the Gong Alarm Clock - $23.59
- Philips Wake-Up Light with Sunrise Simulation & Radio - $89.99
- Floor Mat with Alarm - $149.95
- Ruggie in Blue - $99.00
- Bluecookies Talking Digital Alarm Clock - $9.99
They say Ruggie is "LOUD." In all caps. It's the equivalent of "a blender going off in your bedroom." Also, the floor mat alarm clock must sense the pressure of your feet for at least 3 seconds before it stops its LOUD blender equivalence. And if 3 seconds isn't enough vertical time to keep you from falling back to horizontal, you can set Ruggie to force you to stand there and shake the sleep off for up to 30 seconds to subside its 90- to 120-decibel output.
All of those hideous, horrible-sounding features (figuratively and literally!) are Ruggie's selling points.
Who wants one?
What if Ruggie throws in some customizable daily affirmations and motivational quotes to kickstart your morning? You can upload custom MP3s with nice, soothing words for the mat to feed your ears after you stand its alarm off. The Ruggie itself is also nice and soothing, made of soft fleece with a memory foam center.
DudeIWantThat.com is reader-supported. When you buy through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases. Learn more.
/just-text-us-doormat-42515.jpg?mode=crop "Just Text Us Doormat")
Just Text Us Doormat
"Just text us when you're here. No need to knock and get the dogs involved." Whether you're a pet owner or not, this doormat sends a relatable message. And since anyone who comes over is certainly on their phone right...
Vibrating Ring Alarm Clock
Ring is a vibrating alarm clock that fits over the finger to gently and noiselessly rip slumberers from their states of peace. It is ideal for couples, the hearing impaired, and people who associate the sound of their...
/river-rock-door-mat-62343.jpg?mode=crop "River Rock Door Mat")
River Rock Door Mat
Ever fantasized about stepping across a babbling brook every time you cross your threshold? The River Rock Floor Mat turns that whimsy into reality, minus the soggy socks. Crafted with the smoothest stones that Mother...
/haxson-airfan-over-bed-smart-51341.jpg?mode=crop "Haxson AirFan - Over-Bed Smart Fan Hybrid")
Haxson AirFan - Over-Bed Smart Fan Hybrid
The Haxon AirFan mounts over your bed to create airflow and cool you off at night, yes, but the smart piece of tech also comes with 19 other built-in functions and features to help improve your quality of sleep. Plus...
ZBand Silent Alarm Clock
The Vibrating Ring Alarm Clock may still exist only in concept, but the ZBand, a vibrating bracelet alarm clock, is just a few steps away from silently and unobnoxiously rocking you awake without disturbing significant...
You Snooze You Lose Cash Alarm Clock
In a nutshell--so you can start cookin' up how you're going to use the SnuzNLuz or who you're going to give it to without further ado--what you see here is an alarm clock that connects to your online bank account via...
/whalecum-mat-30299.jpg?mode=crop "Whalecum Mat")
Whalecum Mat
Whalecum, my friends. We have nothing but whalecum for you in this house. Spermy the Whale gives a gushing "Hello!" to all guests who cross the threshold in this delightful Whalecum Mat...
The Barisieur Coffee Brewing Alarm Clock
Josh Renouf knows what the world really needs: coffee. Stat. Like, the second it opens its eyes. And it needs it served from The Barisieur, an alarm clock topped with implements from Beaker's lab. Very nice, Mr. Renouf...
Little Rooster Alarm Clock Vibrator
Oh (face) no, the rooster's crowing (buzzing) already?! Come (yes, please) on! Do I really have to get up (off)? I hear you, ladies. It's a brutal world of mornings, alarms, and orgasms we live in. I'll keep my fingers...
Bike Mine Exploding Anti-Theft Alarm
Bike Mine is a thing that makes you go boommm! At least if you're a dirty thief trying to make off with a dude's bicycle or motorcycle (or boat or jet ski if you live the kind of high rollin' life where that's a risk.)...
/dont-stop-be-leaving-42969.jpg?mode=crop "Don't Stop. Be Leaving. Doormat")
Don't Stop. Be Leaving. Doormat
I'd call the Don't Stop. Be Leaving. Doormat the ultimate Dad joke, but Dad would never be so rude to a visitor. And Dad would never wish a visitor to go away, even salespeople, and Mormons who want to teach him about...
/squid-game-doll-shooting-alarm-51764.jpg?mode=crop "Squid Game Doll Shooting Alarm Clock")
Squid Game Doll Shooting Alarm Clock
Red light, green light, wake up! Or prepare for the Squid Game Doll Shooting Alarm Clock to eliminate you. ... OK, she'll just pelt you with a foam bullet, but still. This piece of Squid Game merch might be the creepiest...