/randimals-stuffed-animals-57256.jpg?mode=crop "Randimals Stuffed Animals")
Randimals Stuffed Animals
Hark! It's a Hork! Randimals Stuffed Animals are huggable mashups of our finest furry, feathered, scaled, and cartilaginous friends. Above you see the Randimals Hork, one possible outcome of a horse mated with a shark...
/the-orgasmic-must-have-for-57255.jpg?mode=crop "The Orgasmic Must-Have For Every Man's Bedroom")
The Orgasmic Must-Have For Every Man's Bedroom
From MysteryVibe: This is the one accessory you will want to wear on your penis. It's an unbelievably good time. Kiss performance anxiety goodbye with MysteryVibe's new Tenuto 2, the world's first male vibrator designed...
/presenting-the-alphabet-16-57248.jpg "Presenting the Alphabet: 16 Gifts that Start with K")
Yippee Ki-K, it's the other "Kuh" sound, and 16 gifts celebrating it. You kooky kids enjoy! And you kantankerous Karens not down with Kong Beer Bongs and Krapp Strapps, shove it up your...well. Please refer to Presenting the Alphabet: 18 Gifts That Start with C...
/neiko-4-in-1-folding-utility-57215.jpg?mode=crop "NEIKO 4-In-1 Folding Utility Knife")
NEIKO 4-In-1 Folding Utility Knife
The NEIKO 4-In-1 Folding Utility Knife reminds me that even though multi-tools aren't all the rage like they were circa 2015 when Leatherman debuted their Tread, they can still be solid pieces of EDC with, as their name...
/3d-christmas-tree-diy-57211.jpg?mode=crop "3D Christmas Tree DIY Soldering Practice Kit")
3D Christmas Tree DIY Soldering Practice Kit
Last year you made the kids help decorate the Christmas tree? This year, make them build it. This DIY Soldering Practice Kit is a basic electronic project for STEM learning and budding makers that will produce a flashing...
/presenting-the-alphabet-et-57210.jpg "Presenting the Alphabet: 18 Gifts that Start with J")
Juicy, Jim, Jedi, Just, and JAG kick off my roundup of 18 gifts that start with "J," and Jeri, JoGo, jelbows, and Juego do Domino close it out. In the middle? A Judy and a Bruce...
/death-by-toys-parody-playsets-57172.jpg?mode=crop "Death By Toys Parody Playsets")
Death By Toys Parody Playsets
Death By Toys Parody Playsets are here to slay your White Elephant and Dirty Santa parties this year thanks to one dude, and one dude alone. Dan Polydoris calls himself a "one-man action figure boutique," and from conception...
/santa-frozen-in-carbonite-57168.jpg?mode=crop "Santa Frozen in Carbonite Christmas Ornament")
Santa Frozen in Carbonite Christmas Ornament
Ho, ho, h-oh no! Santa Claus has gotten himself into a Carbonite pickle! He might survive as Han Solo did, but wasn't Han also frozen up in the stuff for, like, a year? Bad news, kids. I wouldn't waste my time with cookies...
/presenting-the-alphabet-et-57162.jpg "Presenting the Alphabet: 16 Gifts that Start with I")
I've compiled 16 gifts that start with "I," but don't worry. Only one of them starts with "i." And it's an iParody, not another expensive Apple device, or internet-based smart home product that's going to be a bitch to set up, and stop working every time your WiFi has a hiccup. My goal was to give...
/cat-balls-calendar-57137.jpg?mode=crop "Cat Balls Calendar")
Cat Balls Calendar
Now here are some furry friends for you. And all your friends. The Cat Balls Calendar may be the premiere White Elephant and Dirty Santa gift for this holiday season. May be - we're only mid-November, dudes, so I'm just...
/telescoping-christmas-ornament-57132.jpg?mode=crop "Telescoping Christmas Ornament Storage Box")
Telescoping Christmas Ornament Storage Box
Decorating the Christmas tree: fun, festive, and full of egg-nog-filled Moose Mugs. Un-decorating the Christmas tree: suckage. Usually accompanied by tedious ornament wrapping, a few broken ornaments, string light bulb...
/nreal-ar-glasses-57129.jpg?mode=crop "NReal Air AR Glasses")
NReal Air AR Glasses
They're not unreal, they're NReal. They're not virtual reality, they're augmented reality. NReal Air AR Glasses aren't a bunch of fake shit, they're a bunch of real shit...with a bunch of fake shit sprinkled in to make...
/wallet-sized-phone-tripod-57122.jpg?mode=crop "Wallet-Sized Phone Tripod")
Wallet-Sized Phone Tripod
The perfect Instagram post or TikTok video is just a wallet-sized phone tripod away. This ultra-thin, 0.4-ounce phone stand and positioner is a piece of pocket EDC for snapshot snappers and footage fiends of all kinds...
/snoozeshade-pack-play-57121.jpg?mode=crop "SnoozeShade Pack & Play Blackout Crib Tent")
SnoozeShade Pack & Play Blackout Crib Tent
Uh, do they make a SnoozeShade Pack & Play Blackout Crib Tent for adults? Because ever since turning 40, all I've wanted to do at parties and social gatherings is go somewhere and take a nap about an hour in. My wife...
/feejays-adult-footie-57116.jpg?mode=crop "Feejays Adult Footie Sweatpants")
Feejays Adult Footie Sweatpants
Guess who just added some Feejays Adult Footie Sweatpants to his Amazon cart. That's right. This dude. Feejays are sweatpants with built-in fleece-lined socks. The first of many reasons this is awesome is that they're...
/multi-colored-new-york-knife-57114.jpg?mode=crop "Multi-Colored New York Dinner Knife Set")
Multi-Colored New York Dinner Knife Set
This fetching Multi-Colored New York Dinner Knife Set is for everyone on your holiday gift list who doesn't wish for silver and gold...cutlery. The collection includes 7* serrated knives, each a completely different bold...
/wooden-alien-skull-phone-stand-57109.jpg?mode=crop "Wooden Alien Skull Phone Stand")
Wooden Alien Skull Phone Stand
Vadim, woodworker and maker of this Wooden Alien Skull Phone Stand, calls his handmade creation "charming." Ha! Not the "-ing" descriptor I would have gone with over "chilling," "disturbing," or possibly for die-hard...
/the-christmas-movie-cookbook-57105.jpg?mode=crop "The Christmas Movie Cookbook")
The Christmas Movie Cookbook
Honestly, The Christmas Movie Cookbook doesn't appear to have many recipes I'll actually want to make - or even request my mama make for me. Old Fashioned Meatloaf from A Christmas Story? Chicken, Broccoli, and Cheddar...
/leg-chains-57100.jpg?mode=crop "Leg Chains")
Leg Chains
Nothing sets off a slit better than...well, the leg underneath it. Ahem, Angelina Jolie. But after that, definitely one of these Leg Chains. Any one of them. They're all hot. So hot. Like, Yowza!, Waa-waa-wee-wow!, How...
/owl-mittens-57096.jpg?mode=crop "Owl Mittens")
Owl Mittens
Well owl be damned. They didn't just make some Owl Mittens, they made some Owl Mittens covered in owls so realistic they are kind of creeping me out to look at, and I hope I never encounter anyone wearing a pair!...
/presenting-the-alphabet-16-57095.jpg "Presenting the Alphabet: 16 Gifts that Start with H")
Here are 16 smokin' *H*ot and *H*ella cool gifts that start with H. Aitch if you're spelling it out. Haitch if you're spelling it out in the UK or Ireland...
/atomi-smart-tabletop-space-57062.jpg?mode=crop "Atomi Smart Tabletop Space Heater")
Atomi Smart Tabletop Space Heater
Conquer drafty rooms and thermostat dictators who refuse your freezing bones anything above 64 degrees with the Atomi Smart Tabletop Space Heater. The portable unit's 1500W PTC ceramic heating technology needs just 2...
/krapp-strapp-pooping-in-the-57060.jpg?mode=crop "Krapp Strapp - Pooping in the Woods Assistant")
Krapp Strapp - Pooping in the Woods Assistant
Nothing like dropping a deuce in nature...and then toppling over into it, or perhaps a bunch of leaves and twigs that can't wait to give you an anal probe. The Krapp Strapp says, No more! Not to the pooping in the woods...
/presenting-the-alphabet-et-57038.jpg "Presenting the Alphabet: 17 Gifts that Start with G")
I'm feelin' really fine like a G6. No, even better than that. Like a G17. We're onto the letter G, and have I got 17 G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-Great G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-Gifts to share with you...