Accessories

Excuse me while I don my Cloos x Brady Sunglasses and practice my Tom-Brady-gazing-off-in-the-distance pose. It's, like, that same look in every photo of TB modeling his Christopher Cloos eyewear collaboration. What's...

Ampere's Dusk Sunglasses are electrochromic smart sunglasses whose tint you can increase and decrease over 3 levels with a hidden button on one of the temples, or with the eyewear's app. They're kind of like the physical...

Make your favorite flicks of the 80s and 90s - and the VHS tapes that housed them - part of your EDC with these Miniature VHS Movie Keychain Charms. Available in dozens of different titles, the nostalgic trinkets are...

Or should I call them Half Frame Rhinestone Non-Glasses? The "W" shape of that lady's...uh...eyewear must stand for "What the four-eyes are these things?!" They don't improve your vision, they don't help you see in the...

See that notch on the KATANA personal safety smartphone wallet? And the tab the lady is pulling on to draw something out of the back of the cardholder? Guess what it is. Nope. Not a katana. Not a sword at all. It's a...

Why do my burger & fries taste like cardboard? Actually, it's more like...poly-cotton yarn. Better wash it away with my beer - ugh! My beer tastes like sweaty feet! What is this, Heineken?...

The Baby Yodas in Amazon's limited edition The Mandalorian The Child 6-Pin Set have something poking out besides their ears. No! You dirty minds! Metal skewers soldered to each of their backs, so you can flair up your...

Launch Vitamin D, CoQ10 & CBD missiles! For all your tough pills to swallow, here's the Torpedo Pill Holder, an even tougher container to carry them in. Made of aerospace aluminum, the projectile-shaped piece of EDC is...

The Grid Antimicrobial Copper Wallet would like to take you off the Grid. And by "you" I mean any bacteria and viruses that dare try to infiltrate its armor - the Grid Copper starts killing them upon contact...

Just as Bluetooth connectivity has brought us hands-free talking, it, along with gadgety eyewear like the Lucyd Loud Audio Sunglasses and Bose Frames, has kinda brought us ear-free listening. Lucyd Loud is fitted with...

Why do I have to take a friendship test? Cornelius is my bro, he knows I'd do anything for him. Come over and jump his car at 6 a.m. Wingman him at an interpretive dance performance and reception the barista he's horndoggin'...

The Weatherman Umbrella knows not everyone can be Mary Poppins on a rainy day, but when the wind picks up anyone with a crappy umbrella can be...the dude who gets drenched and disheveled because his umbrella blows inside...

Instant pimp, at your service. And, sure, the Pocket Cane is also a convenient and less cumbersome way for the injured and elderly to keep a walking stick close at hand...

I guess these I Wash My Hands of The Virus buttons are the equivalents of I Voted buttons for people who practice responsible COVID-19 prevention practices. Or maybe they'll appeal to the growing frustration with the...

Call me 4-eyes again and I'll suck you into the hell portals that are the outer 2 of them! Nah, I'm just kiddin'. I'm too high to do that right now. Let's just dance like maniacs to the strobing LEDs and pass out once...

Thanks for shopping at CVS! Here's your 6'-long receipt for the pack of condoms you bought for you 6"-long penis. Yep, our receipts are long and strong, here to make you feel inadequate and environmentally unfriendly...

I don't know why my first instinct...and second and third...is to make fun of the Nubrella. A wearable hands-free umbrella that mounts to your back, shielding you from rain and shading you from sun, no gripping, positioning...

These Beer Mug Socks are actually more like Beer Mug Leg Warmers, but yarn maestro Vicky Djokic probably figured referring to her most excellent hand-knit frothy pints o' brew as "leg warmer" would deter men from clicking...

Westwell isn't the first handycompany to sneak tools into the buckles of their fashion belts, but they are the first I've seen to make the tools modular and swappable, as well as with an option to keep them completely...

They come from the 4EST, but these wood sunglasses have no problem heading to the ocean, lake, or river too. Made from real maple, the wayfarers are lightweight and low-density, so if you drop them in the water, they'll...

Coins. What a pain in my ass. Piles of them overflow various dishes and trays around my condo, smirking at me from behind their hugely disproportionate ratio of weight and manageability to value. Even the quarter suck...

Got a fat head on the wrong end? Faded Days isn't the only brand that makes polarized XXL sunglasses for people with big heads, but they do seem particularly committed to the process. First they ran a wide-head-sunglasses...