Maqoo Cooling Underwear
They're not quite as...vented...as a pair of Manties, but Maqoo still believes their new linen blend of underwear will be the coolest your boys will ever cradle. At least from a degrees Fahrenheit point of view. Aesthetically, while more presentable in the locker room than lacy lingerie for men might be, they don't travel too far outside of the tighty whitey category. Sure, I'd be glad to Maqoo on a long plane ride or the outdoor wedding She-Ra: Princess of Power is making me attend in 95-degree heat this weekend if wearing a pair meant an exponential increase in comfort, but I hope this One Underwear to Rule Them All will consider adding a few more colors, or even a giant grizzly bear crotch to their line. (Actually, this probably won't happen. Part of Maqoo's ethos is to keep it simple.)
The underoo gurus at Maqoo haven't just created a new application for their boxer briefs' fabric, they have created the fabric itself. In fact, the company's blend of 81% linen, 16% nylon, and 3% spandex came about even before the idea for the underwear; their approach is to "develop fabrics first, and then design [their] products minimalist." The stretch linen result of this textile endeavor works for undergarments because linen is known for its breathability and cooling effects. Another plus of this trait: Maqoo could increase the fabric's stitch count without adding extra insulation. So the underwear dissipate heat over an extra large surface area of fibers rather than trapping it, or absorbing and condensing it to create those unpleasant "moist balls" and "dewy butt crack" effects.
Unlike linen shirts, Maqoo fabric is knitted instead of woven. The interlocking thread method provides stretch in all directions, and unrestricted movement. If you want a pair for yourself, get your pledge in on Kickstarter by August 27, 2015.
Fundies: Underwear Built for Two
According to every woman's favorite book, The Five Love Languages, physical touch is the predominant type of love males enjoy receiving, while quality time earns high marks with the ladies. Fundies, a chic pair of tandem...
Cute Ass Animals Underwear
Etsy vendor Nichola's Knickerockers, underwear with adorable animal faces strategically sewn across one of my favorite places on earth, are pricey. But to all ladies who often get mistaken for Victoria's Secret models...
Shreddies Fart-Filtering Underwear
Leave it to the Brits to class up farts and poots. And also to create a solution that spares those who didn't just drop a silent stink bomb from inhaling the fumes released by the one who did. Shreddies is a line of men's...
/eletrunks-lifter-underwear-25033.jpg "Eletrunks \"Lifter\" Underwear")
Eletrunks "Lifter" Underwear
Though the above video is slightly NSFW, Eletrunks are not a dirty or obscene pair of underwear. At all. The company's demo of their functional, comfort-enhancing, package-adjusting Lifter cord just makes it look like...
Latex Bat Underwear
Warning: Abigail Greydanus' latex bat underwear are slightly NSFW. Probably both in terms of viewing enlarged photos of them, and physically wearing them at the office, as my experience with latex is that it is the textile...
Nerds with Vaginas Underwear
Did you get drunk and pee your pants last night? Did you throw your panties on stage during the New Year's Eve Super Diamond Neil Diamond cover band show? Did you sneak out of the bed you woke up in at 5:00 a.m. and leave...
Manties Men's Lace Boxers
Last month this a-hole at my office left a box of Edible Anus chocolates on my desk with a note that said, "I saw these and thought of your face." Now everyone at work calls me Buttmuncher. Like we're 12! So for next...
MyPakage Keyhole Comfort Underwear
While a keyhole connotes something very small into which one inserts something else very small...and then, uh, forcefully twists it 360 degrees clockwise or counterclockwise...I assure you that MyPakage underwear's KeyHole...
/the-ball-lifter-nsfw-19337.jpg?mode=crop "The Ball Lifter (NSFW)")
The Ball Lifter (NSFW)
I know what you're thinking: is that a push-up bra...for my balls? The answer is yes. The Ball Lifter was designed to lift and embellish your package without pumps, pills, or other male member enhancement quackery. It's...
Lace Skull & Crossbones Pants
Plea to All Women: I implore you to buy these pants. And wear them in my presence. White, lace, skulls. They're the trifecta of my fantasies. Throw in flowing, partially see-through, and looking to be very soft, and I...
/bulletproof-mens-underwear-38126.jpg?mode=crop "Bulletproof Men's Underwear")
Bulletproof Men's Underwear
So what exactly does the Like New qualifier on these bulletproof men's underwear mean? The exact words in Sportsman's Guide's listing are British Military Surplus Blast Shorts With Kevlar, Like New. Are they saying, "Yeah...
Jean Shorts Underwear
Nothing I could say would contribute any more to your perception of these jean shorts underwear than the pictured model with the girly figure and manly package. From that you can take away: 1) They're denim boxer briefs...