Clothing

Columbia Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back Coats

$400 Columbia »

Leia: I'm freezing. Han: I know. The Star Wars saga infiltrates Columbia Sportswear - or, more likely, Columbia Sportswear infiltrates the Star Wars saga - again this year, with a limited-edition series of The Empire...

California Cowboy Aloha & Apres Ski Apparel

$38 - $148 California Cowboy »

Cowboy out of respect, California to the core. California Cowboy makes clothing that urges you to "Put your phone away and start a conversation." Their High Water and High Sierra aloha and apres ski shirts even have a...

Frosty the Eunuch Ugly Christmas Sweater

$59.95 Amazon »

Ugly Christmas Sweater season is here. The days, they have shortened. The temperatures, they have dropped. And the Tipsy Elves, they have knitted. The tacky, silly, funny, and dirty entries in their 2017 sweater line...

The Dude Abides Ugly Christmas Sweater

$41.95 Amazon »

While I appreciate the idea of this Dude Abides Ugly Christmas Sweater, I think it missed its chance of truly abiding by not making the background a Persian rug motif. Bowling balls and pins are nice and Lebowski affiliated...

Method Raincoat Sweatshirt

$99 - $109 MINIM Gear »

What's the Method? Add 1 part sweatshirt, 1 part raincoat, and 3 parts 21st century textile hocus pocus to a pot, and simmer until soft, cozy, and hydrophobic. MINIM Gear is crowdfunding their Method pullovers and zip-ups...

Stone Island Ice Knit Thermo-Sensitive Sweaters

$1,518 - $2,136 Stone Island »

When I first saw Stone Island's Ice Knit thermo-sensitive sweaters I was like, Hey, those Hypercolor sweaters are cool. And then I saw their price and I was like, Oh, that must be in Mexican pesos. But no! Prices are...

Lalabu Dad Shirt

Sold Out Amazon »

The Lalabu Dad Shirt is a different kind of Dadbag. One that some men will consider just as big of a joke, but that others, such dudes with infants who find themselves piling on as much gear as they once did for a weeklong...

Vollebak Solar Charged Jacket

$350 Vollebak »

Vollebak's Solar Charged Jacket does for Slimer Green what the clothing startup's Baker Miller Naptime Hoodie did for Unicorn Pink: it takes a crazy cut from Roy G Biv, and gives it a highly functional application. Naptime's...

Waterproof Socks

$31.20 - $49.86 Amazon »

Showers Pass made these waterproof socks to keep athletes' and other F the rain weather warriors' feet dry when they run, hike, and bike in anything from light drizzles to torrential downpours...

Spartan Radiation-Blocking Underwear

$45 Spartan »

Spartan Underwear heard the refrain every time some newfangled food or drug or piece of tech came out too: "Twenty years from now they'll probably find out it kills you." Or, in the case of the radiation given off by...

ScorpionExo Covert Kevlar Flannel Shirt

$129.95 - $140.21 Amazon »

Kevlar flannel. It's why Kurt Cobain didn't die in a motorcycle crash. Nah. I don't know if Cobain even rode a bike. But if he did, ScorpionExo's Covert Flannel could have helped save his hide if he went down. The shirt...

Conor McGregor F*ck You Pinstripe Suit

$6,500 David August »

I don't know how long the rest of the world will remember the Conor McGregor vs. Floyd Mayweather fight after it's over, but anyone who drops $6,500 on a David August Fuck You pinstripe suit like the one McGregor wore...

Saint Unbreakable Motorcycle Jeans

$175 - $360 Saint »

When Saint calls their motorcycle jeans "unbreakable," they mean it without jest or hyperbole. And they're willing to put their body weight, their belt grinder, their X-acto knife, and their brute force where their mouth...

aRks 3D Printed Bikinis

aRks 3D has prototyped a series of 3D printed bikinis they call Coral. And I know what all the dudes out there are thinking: that's some Coral I'd sure like to come across in the ocean. In stark contrast what's running...

Sexy Chest Swimsuit

Sold Out Amazon »

A sexy man chest to caress and a sexy swimsuit to wear to your next pool outing - talk about having your cake and eating it too, ladies. Good for more than just a few laughs or you next gag gift, the Sexy Chest Swimsuit...

Cel Shaded Jeans

$158.43 Etsy »

Need your video games and comic books on you at all times? Deja Neuf Heures has come up with a slightly different way to accomplish that: hand-painted cel shaded jeans...

Insect Shield Mail-in Bug Repellent Clothing Treatment

$64.95 - $149.95 Insect Shield »

Insect Shield started making its Insect Repellent Apparel in 2001, and has gone on to provide various areas of the US Military, Rio Olympics athletes, and 70+ lifestyle clothing brands with clothing treated with its proprietary...

Mousou Exposed Butt T-Shirt

I just...I can't...I...what the butt, Japan?! The Mousou Exposed Butt T-Shirt baffles me on so many levels. First, why is the butt positioned so that it's exploding out of the wearer's chest Alien-style? Why is it on...

Brocade Dinner & Smoking Jacket

$625 Etsy »

Come on, Cousin Larry, don't be re-dikoolous, this is a niiiice jacket. I would wear it to my wedding. And I'd definitely wear it to your wedding. Machete 'N' Sons' Brocade Dinner & Smoking Jackets are part of their Decadence...

Sitting-Pocket Sweatpants

$79.20 Beta Brand »

Pockets. Designed to hold stuff while your hands are busy. Pockets. Designed to drop stuff or make it really, really hard to get to when you sit down. Sitting pockets. Designed to conquer. Sitting pockets hold things...

The Traxedo - Tuxedo Track Suits

$23.58 - $89.99 Amazon »

Ahhh, Traxedo. The perfect response to the next time my girlfriend tells me to put on some nice clothes and take her to the (obscenely overpriced) wine & tapas bar. Ahhh, Traxedo. The polyester penguin suit that will...

MeatSweats Relaxation Pants

MeatSweats want to help you kick back, relax, and show the world how proud you are of the 32-ounce porterhouse you demolished all by yourself. Their 100% polyester construction would also be happy to wick away the dew...

Wearable Diaper Bags for Dads

$89 - $99 DadGear »

A wearable diaper bag for dads may not sound like it wants to be less humiliating than the Daddle dad saddle for all you new papas out there, but I promise you subtlety is DadGear's primary focus with their baby-ready...

DU/ER Performance Denim & No Sweat Pants

$120 - $129 dish & DU/ER »

dish & DU/ER sent me a review pair of their N2X No Sweat Pants, and here's how I tested them out: I wore them to Thanksgiving dinner. Three plates and two pieces of apple pie...a la mode...later, I still didn't feel the...