Uncle Sam Swimsuit
/uncle-sam-swimsuit-4151.jpg "Uncle Sam Swimsuit")
- Confederate Flag Bikini - $23.99
- American Flag Bikini - $26.99
- Uncle Samantha Costume - $125.20
- USA Leg Warmers - $8.95
- United States Olympic Committee Team USA 2012 Summer Olympics T-Shirt - $19.99
Uncle Sam has always had kind of a negative connotation to me. Until now. I guess he just needed the right context. Strategic placement on a nice Polyester/nylon/Lycra medium.
Another in a long line of quirky, nerdy, yet surprisingly sexy swimsuits from Black Milk Clothing, the Uncle Sam incarnation would like to wish each and every one of you a safe and happy 4th of July. Filled with friends, booze, BBQs, girls in hot bathing suits splashing around in cool bodies of water, and a few hours of respite from bitching about American government and its metaphorical Uncle overlord. Today of all days, let us be reminded that no country is perfect, and those of us who call America home are pretty lucky SOBs.
Who will feel even luckier once Team USA starts raking in the gold at the Summer 2012 Olympics.
EQUUS BASS770 - New American Muscle Car
Designed and manufactured in the USA. That's the battle cry of the 2014 EQUUS BASS770, a contemporary nod to American muscle cars of the 60s and 70s. It's also probably the reason for its starting price tag of $250 grand...
/shocked-trump-swinsuit-62314.jpg?mode=crop "Shocked Trump Swimsuit")
Shocked Trump Swimsuit
Ever thought the beach was missing a bit of... politics? Well, fear no more! The Donald Trump Swimsuit is here to fill that void. Imagine this: a one-piece swimsuit emblazoned with the larger-than-life, zoomed-in face...
/sharkini-swimsuit-8700.jpg?mode=crop "Sharkini Swimsuit")
Sharkini Swimsuit
Sharks are scary. Girls are scary. Gaaahhh! It's the worst hybrid ever! To all Dude Facebook readers who expressed sentiments of peeved off at our posting of a Sharkini photo without information about where to throw wads...
The Batman Collection
Black Milk Clothing's Batman Collection has a Batsuit for every type of crime a girl could want to fight. For example, not looking hot. Or not showing enough leg. Not showing enough cleavage. Not wearing a belted Bat-Signal...
Mass Effect Clothing
I know many of you are thinking it, so I'm just gonna put it on paper: the mass effect of Black Milk's Mass Effect body-hugging clothing collection is to effectively give every male fan of the video game series a massive...
/confederate-p51-combat-fighter-18773.jpg?mode=crop "Confederate P51 Combat Fighter")
Confederate P51 Combat Fighter
Confederate has been releasing Combat motorcycles regularly since 1999; just during my short tenure in these parts we've seen the formidable X132 Hellcat Combat and its follow-up, the equally vicious X132 Hellcat Speedst
/finfolk-custom-mermaid-tails-12616.jpg?mode=crop "Finfolk Custom Mermaid Tails")
Finfolk Custom Mermaid Tails
By what magnitude would the awesomeness of mud wrestling increase if all the ladies participating got to wear a Finfolk Productions 100% dragonskin and platinum cure silicone mermaid tail? Muddy, slippery, rolling on...
/mil-spec-unique-gifts-for-33385.jpg?mode=crop "MIL-SPEC: Unique Gifts for Military Men")
MIL-SPEC: Unique Gifts for Military Men
I'm not calling this compilation Unique Gifts for Military Men to dog the ladies. I respect and admire all the fine soldiers and veterans, male and female alike, who have poured their bodies, minds, and years of their...
/the-tata-top-39533.jpg?mode=crop "The TaTa Top (NSFW)")
The TaTa Top (NSFW)
Where was the TaTa Top flesh-colored bikini with nipples when I was having fun with anatomical optical illusions a couple weeks ago? Guess I'll have to retroactively add this eye-(and pants-)popping swimsuit to my Breast...
/mens-one-piece-thanos-39341.jpg?mode=crop "Men's One-Piece Thanos Swimsuit")
Men's One-Piece Thanos Swimsuit
Thanos may finally get his wish of wiping out half the world's population if enough dudes don a men's one-piece Thanos swimsuit this summer. And I thought the ladies' version was disturbing. But I guess as the great Titan...
Patriots Being Badass Prints
These patriots heard the battle cry of Team America, and hollered back an even louder Fuck Yeah! From Paul Revere's Midnight Ride on a Tron Light Cycle to Abe Lincoln wielding an M16 and giddy-upping on a grizzly bear...
/pamela-anderson-x-frankies-60047.jpg?mode=crop "Pamela Anderson x Frankies Bikinis Collection")
Pamela Anderson x Frankies Bikinis Collection
The Pamela Anderson x Frankies Bikinis Collection drops at noon ET on May 4, 2023, and all I've got to say about this collaboration between the smokin' hot 55-year-old Baywatch star and the smokin' hot swimsuit brand...