3D Printed Camel Dick (NSFW)
Four legs, two humps, two testicles, and one...big...dick...head. Meet the Camel Dick, the newest addition to the animal dick menagerie we began last year with the 3D Printed Dickasaurus.
Camel Dick, aka Dicky Camel, aka Dromedick comes...only if you drill a hole in his neck shaft and insert, like, a lotion pump in his peehole. But he's available in 5 different sizes, ranging from an unfortunate curse of 2" tall, to a respectable 6" tall. Over 2 dozen colors, including glow in the dark and blue glitter, are also up for coating, and stroking, your Camel Dick.
/10-images-i-cant-believe-are-43138.jpg?mode=crop "10 Images I Can't Believe Are Allowed on Amazon (NSFW)")
10 Images I Can't Believe Are Allowed on Amazon (NSFW)
And I mean very NSFW. I mean, it's not like I came across* these 10 images I can't believe are allowed on Amazon because I was searching for porn, boobies, or sex toys on Amazon. I was just minding my own business, perusing...
/penis-weight-set-43612.jpg?mode=crop "Penis Weight Set")
Penis Weight Set
All the talk of building a prison body during quarantine made me seek out this penis weight set. Because while you can certainly do pushups, pullups, chinups, dips, and squats like a convicted felon, it's gonna be real...
/heres-the-rub-the-best-male-45378.jpg?mode=crop "Here's the Rub: The Best Male Masturbatory Aids (NSFW)")
Here's the Rub: The Best Male Masturbatory Aids (NSFW)
The very best male masturbatory aids always have been and always will be porn - obviously - but recent developments in sex toy tech and gadgetry, and the fact that dating is even trickier during a pandemic than it is...
/pacos-taco-stroker-22826.jpg "Paco's Taco Stroker")
Paco's Taco Stroker
At first I was like, Who the h-e-double-boner named this kitchen tool "Paco's Taco Stroker?" I'm going to make so many masturbation jokes when I write about it. And then I looked closer and was like, Holy hard-on! They...
/fun-with-anatomical-optical-39428.jpg?mode=crop "Fun with Anatomical Optical Illusions (NSFW)")
Fun with Anatomical Optical Illusions (NSFW)
I've found some choice anatomical optical illusions for your viewing pleasure this evening (or morning with your computer rearview mirror on your monitor at work). Most are just momentary illusions whose true nature is...
/tirecockz-prank-tire-valve-39733.jpg?mode=crop "Tirecockz Prank Tire Valve Stem Caps")
Tirecockz Prank Tire Valve Stem Caps
Ain't no practical joke more practical than Tirecockz. The ridickulous penis tire valve stem caps will humiliate your friend Cornelius (more than driving a Dodge Neon beater already does) but still protect his valve stems...
/jizz-the-game-32858.jpg?mode=crop "Jizz the Game (NSFW)")
Jizz the Game (NSFW)
Huh, an 8" pink penis called Jizz the Game. I wonder how you play that. Maybe some of you bachelorettes out there prepping for your buttery-nipple- and dick-straw-filled parties as we head into wedding season can test...
/unleash-the-kraken-male-42200.jpg?mode=crop "Unleash the Kraken Male Vibrator (NSFW)")
Unleash the Kraken Male Vibrator (NSFW)
While we normally think of the kraken as wielding tentacles of asphyxiation and death, what if in fact the giant squid is all about pleasure? What if his tentacles, as they appear willing and able to do in this male vibrator...
/balldo-ball-dildo-to-double-48060.jpg?mode=crop "balldo - Ball-Dildo to Double Your Penis Count (NSFW)")
balldo - Ball-Dildo to Double Your Penis Count (NSFW)
"Make 2021 the year of ballsex!" Well, balldo, it's not the worst idea anyone's ever had. Plus, given all the horrible things 2020 was the year of, and the lackluster way 2021 has kicked off, a brand new ball-dildo that...
/willy-care-kit-26966.jpg?mode=crop "Willy Care Kit")
Willy Care Kit
If your name isn't William, and you don't need a gift for a dude named William, I can't imagine why you'd buy a Willy Care grooming kit. I mean, I know it's a common name and all, but are there really enough Willies out...
/crochet-penis-blanket-49439.jpg?mode=crop "Crochet Penis Blanket")
Crochet Penis Blanket
Cozy up next to the fire pit with a warm, cuddly...cock & balls?! This Crochet Penis Blanket from Naughty Mature Gifts will make you snug as a bug in a...er...opposite of rug on cool summer evenings and <a href="https://www.dudeiwantthat.com/blog/the...
Raunchy Wrapping Paper (NSFW)
Raunchy Wrap R-rated wrapping paper reminds me of something my lyrical hero Ludacris once said during his guest vocals on Usher's smash hit dance track "Yeah": "I want a lady in the street, but a freak in the bed." This...