Tiger King Carole Baskin Doormat
Despite the post's title and the flowery crowns flanking it, this Tiger King Carole Baskin Doormat is probably meant to welcome visitors to Joe Exotic's Greater Wynnewood Exotic Animal Park. Not that bitch Carole Baskin's Big Cat Rescue. Of course, you can use it to welcome visitors to your own home too.
All visitors except for that bitch, Carole Baskin.
Poor Carole Baskin. How did she, the player in Netflix's Tiger King docuseries who wasn't the star of the vindictiveness and attempted murder plotline, end up bein the one everyone is calling vindictive and a murderer?
Oh yeah. Because she killed her husband, ground him up, and fed him to her tigers.
My personal feelings about Carole Baskin are just past neutral. I don't like her, but I don't despise her, and I'm not that interested in conspiracy theories about her beyond relishing the irony of a supposed animal rights activist killing her husband and feeding him to tigers. However. I would like a doormat like this one from The Minted Grove that says, "All are welcome. Except for that bitch, my black-hearted ex-girlfriend Karen."
DudeIWantThat.com is reader-supported. When you buy through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases. Learn more.
/just-text-us-doormat-42515.jpg?mode=crop "Just Text Us Doormat")
Just Text Us Doormat
"Just text us when you're here. No need to knock and get the dogs involved." Whether you're a pet owner or not, this doormat sends a relatable message. And since anyone who comes over is certainly on their phone right...
/river-rock-door-mat-62343.jpg?mode=crop "River Rock Door Mat")
River Rock Door Mat
Ever fantasized about stepping across a babbling brook every time you cross your threshold? The River Rock Floor Mat turns that whimsy into reality, minus the soggy socks. Crafted with the smoothest stones that Mother...
/whalecum-mat-30299.jpg?mode=crop "Whalecum Mat")
Whalecum Mat
Whalecum, my friends. We have nothing but whalecum for you in this house. Spermy the Whale gives a gushing "Hello!" to all guests who cross the threshold in this delightful Whalecum Mat...
/dont-stop-be-leaving-42969.jpg?mode=crop "Don't Stop. Be Leaving. Doormat")
Don't Stop. Be Leaving. Doormat
I'd call the Don't Stop. Be Leaving. Doormat the ultimate Dad joke, but Dad would never be so rude to a visitor. And Dad would never wish a visitor to go away, even salespeople, and Mormons who want to teach him about...
/spider-web-light-up-doormat-61297.jpg?mode=crop "Spider Web Light Up Doormat")
Spider Web Light Up Doormat
I'll welcome only those with webbed feet into my home this Halloween. Feet, that is, that have been wiped clean on my Spider Web Light Up Doormat...
/tile-mat-customizable-doormat-40042.jpg?mode=crop "Tile Mat Customizable Doormat")
Tile Mat Customizable Doormat
If you're gonna be a doormat, may as well be a Tile doormat that can say whatever the F it wants! The Tile Mat is a fully customizable, and infinitely changeable, floor mat consisting of a white snap-in backing and black...
Snow-Melting Stair Mat
What?! A snow-melting stair mat? And a baby demonstrating its use?! But the best part of accumulated Mother Nature dandruff is watching little kids wipe out trying to navigate through it! I do feel bad for old people...
Alligator in a Manhole Doormat
Though not as blood-curdling as a breaching shark in an elevator, an alligator snarling up through a manhole cover on my front doorstep should make uninvited visitors take pause long enough to second guess their decision...
/audacity-doormat-51344.jpg?mode=crop "Audacity Doormat")
Audacity Doormat
If you think "audacity" is too harsh of a word for this doormat...then you are almost certainly they type of person who doesn't call or text before "stopping by" people's homes. You are also the type of person I bought...
/retro-rpg-menu-doormat-16020.jpg "Retro RPG Menu Doormat")
Retro RPG Menu Doormat
I think what I would do if I had this RPG command doormat is carry it around to other people's front doorsteps with me instead of installing it on my own...
/ninamar-mud-scrubber-rubber-58868.jpg?mode=crop "Mud Scrubber Rubber Brush Mat")
Mud Scrubber Rubber Brush Mat
Will the Mud Scrubber Rubber Brush Mat finally get my mama off my back about my feet? My feet that are only wet and muddy and covered with ice melt because I was out shoveling her sidewalk?...
MudBlade Shoe Scraper
Sure you could use a knife to clean the caked dirt and gunk out of the crevices of your shoes. You could also use a knife to clean the caked dirt and gunk out from under your fingernails. But it's probably not the best...