Household

MBI Mini Flashlight Matchbook

$32 indiegogo »

Strike a MatchLight. Actually, just press its head lightly against any hard surface to set this little flame ablaze. The MBI MatchBook is an 8-strong set of tiny LED flashlights lined up and packaged just like their fire-summoning...

UpCart - All-Terrain Stair-Climbing Cart

Sold Out Amazon »

I wish someone would make a suitcase with these UpCart kind of wheels on it. I just got back from Mexico, a land of many stairs and no elevators, and now me and She-Ra: Princess of Power's so-called "roller bags" are...

Gun Cylinder Pen Holder

$25.64 Amazon »

Father's is right around the corner! March 27. This year, make sure you get Dad something he--what's up? Oh. Really, March 27 is Easter, not Father's Day. Huh...

Outdoor Swinging Lounge

Discontinued

Now this chair looks mighty comfortable. Miiiiighty comfortable indeed. And I think I might feel just as comfortable watching that mighty cute brunette swinging in it on a breezy summer day as I would be taking a turn...

Alpaca Grinder

$69 Alpaca »

I don't know what an alpaca has to do with herb grinding, but I do know that after reading about this Alpaca Grinder before I went to bed last night I had a dream that I shared a sausage and green pepper pizza with an...

KoMo Fidibus 21 Grain Mill

Sold Out Amazon »

Kamut and spelt and millet, oh my! A little bit of quinoa in my life, a little bit of amaranth by my side. A little bit of barley's all I need, a little bit of sorghum is what I see. Wheat and oats, rice brown and white...

Clean Park Drip Mats

$34.95 - $222.95 Amazon »

Snow and mud, or if you drive my hoopdie of a 4-door, oil and whatever other internal fluids are seeping from the car's belly. Sure, it's a concrete floor. In the garage. But you still may want to keep it in decent condition...

High Neon Sign

Hey, it's a neon sign that tells you where on the wall to hang it. Or maybe it's deeper than that. Maybe this neon sign is telling you what you are...

Holstein Housewares Empanada Maker

$19.71 - $22.17 Amazon »

The last electric empanada maker I showed you was from Nostalgia Electrics, but this one from Holstein Housewares is waaaay better in terms of: empanada size and shape (smaller, finger food-style with an authentic crinkle-pressed...

Pizza Slice Night Light

Sold Out Amazon »

If you ever wake up at 3 a.m. with the munchies and try to exhibit some restraint, here's your solution. This Pizza Slice Night Light will happily taunt you, lure you, and even light your way to the kitchen. It's got...

Egg Monster Toast Cutter

$8.99 Perpetual Kid »

Forget Toads in the Hole, the brave, the strong, the warriors who truly want to conquer their day kick it off with a little Eye of the Beast. Ahhh, breakfast has never been geekier and breaking the yolk never more satisfying...

Firemask Emergency Escape Hood

Discontinued

I feel like, for the average American, the likelihood of experiencing a house fire is way higher than the likelihood of experiencing a nuclear biological chemical situation, but it's gas masks that get all the bug out...

Wear-N-Write Wearable Dry Erase Board

$18.99 Amazon »

May I present to you the latest breakthrough in wearable technology: the Wear-N-Write Dry Erase Board! No Bluetooth, no app, and no recharging required for use!...

Eye-Vac Home Touchless Vacuum

$149 Amazon »

Unlike robot vacuum cleaners, the Eye-Vac Home touchless vacuum doesn't follow your cat around all day sucking up the hair he sheds and crumbs he drops from the tunafish sandwiches he makes himself for lunch. Instead...

Revolver Shot Glass

Sold Out Amazon »

I recently showed you some bullets you can't shoot, so I'd like to complement them with a revolver you can. In fact, the Revolver Glass is guaranteed to give you the perfect shot. Just watch your aim...

KitchenAid 3-Speed Hand Blender

Sold Out Amazon »

This week's Plenty Vaporizer giveaway has got me hungry. I'll take anything you got, but some nachos, homemade pork sausage (patties, not links, please), a coupla grilled cheeses with tomato soup, and a cheesecake would...

Wine Bottle Fire Extinguisher

$149.95 Wine Enthusiast »

Bad news: this Wine Bottle Fire Extinguisher is not a real wine bottle. Good news: it is a real fire extinguisher. I got my mama one for Christmas and it has all the same heft and handles and gauges as the traditional...

Edible Spoon Maker

How large of a pile of strawberry jam can I scoop up in an Edible Spoon made out of Grands Biscuit dough? I don't know, but I can't wait to find out once this groundbreaking Edible Spoon Maker hits the free market. The...

Stelton Pure Black Knives

$57.55 - $279.30 Amazon »

Sometimes applying the all-black treatment to common household items looks rad (e.g., jacuzzis, toilet paper). Other times it looks like it might kill you if you use it (e.g., toothpaste, <a href="https://www.dudeiwantthat.com/food/novel

Sith Happens Darth Vader Toilet Decal

Discontinued

Sith Happens. Dude, I'll bet it's especially Sithy when Sith happens to Vader and he's gotta take off the entire bottom half of a life support system to relieve himself. I thought I'd experienced the worst of the worst...

Pizzeria Pronto Stovetop Pizza Oven

$69.99 Amazon »

Pizzacraft has made stovetop spinoff to their Pizzeria Pronto Outdoor Pizza Oven. It's called the Pizzeria Pronto Stovetop Pizza Oven. Don't worry, I'm sure the design and performance are a lot more inspired than the...

J-Pillow Travel Pillow

$34.95 - $39.95 Amazon »

I know it looks like a big ol' dumb...J...but the J-Pillow is the undisputed champion of all the travel pillows I've ever tried*. Its bubble letter "legs" create a golden ratio of ergonomic support for my head and neck...

Cutting Boredom Cutting Boards

$35 - $125 Etsy »

If you're not into Final Fantasy, maybe you'd like Tony Montana and "Scarf Place" on your cutting board. Or Jules Winnfield demanding, "Let's get these motherfuckin steaks on that motherfuckin flame!" Or Inigo Montoya...

Warming Foot Massager

$34.79 Amazon »

This Shiatsu Massage Pillow is hands down the greatest purchase I made in 2015. Maybe ever. You have a lot to live up to, Warming Foot Massager...