Hippopotamus Lawn Ornaments
/hippopotamus-lawn-ornament-12007.jpg "Hippopotamus Lawn Ornament")
- T-Rex Garden Sculpture - $139.95
- The Swamp Beast Crocodile Garden Sculpture - $86.97
- The Dragon of Falkenberg Castle Moat Lawn Statue - $89.95
- Velociraptor, Jurassic - Sized Dinosaur Statue - $2,542.50
- 24 Garden Butterfly Stakes - $9.77
This is possibly the only lawn ornament that could increase both your property value and your popularity with the neighbors. Brit Martin Pool creates his hippopotamus garden sculptures in Daddy and Jr. sizes, and has designed them to protect your lawn from encroaching zombie flamingoes, Scarface gnomes, and diarrhetic pugs either solo, or in a familial pod. A pod of hippos in my front yard! Add to Wish List, please!
Pool casts the hippo sculptures with a mixture of concrete and fine grain sand to bring out the finer details and texturing of the water-loving beasts. Bulls (or I guess they could be cows since all adult hippopotami are pretty massive) measure 22" long x 12" wide x 5" tall, and calves 17" long x 7" wide x 3" tall. Pool also recommends pairing two or three together, with the large hippo head in the front and the smaller full hippos behind it, to create a false perspective lawn installation. When viewed at a certain angle, it will appear as if the those in the back are much farther away, and smack of a hippopotamus gang you might see in the wild.
If you really want to one-up the Joneses with the Caulder mobile, team up a hippo sculpture with Pool's crocodile head and let them rule the block together.
/Zombie-Gnomes-Bye-Bye-Birdie-571.jpg?mode=crop "Zombie Gnomes: Bye Bye Birdie")
Zombie Gnomes: Bye Bye Birdie
This is what we call an imperfect synergy. In the battle of the two tackiest, yet most often seen yard decorations (no offense fake plastic deer), it looks as if the gnomes have won. And it was bloody. Zombie gnomes 1...
/Combat-Garden-Gnome-1414.jpg?mode=crop "Combat Garden Gnome")
Combat Garden Gnome
People just can't wait to pervert emblems of peace and goodwill, can they? First the benevolent garden gnome goes zombie and now he's Charlton Heston. Still, at under a foot tall, these combative cuties make perfect pairs--or...
/hippopotamus-sofa-20691.jpg "Hippopotamus Sofa")
Hippopotamus Sofa
It's too late to say you want a hippopotamus for Christmas, but maybe if you're real good, kids, Mommy or Daddy (or Sugar Daddy, ladies) will get you a hippopotamus for Valentine's Day. This one you won't even have to...
/game-of-gnomes-throne-of-a-11903.jpg "Game of Gnomes: Throne of a Thousand Shovels")
Game of Gnomes: Throne of a Thousand Shovels
After their zombie gnomes ate most of the rest of the lawn ornaments, artists Chris Stever and Jane DeRosa had to go back to the casting board to create an installation that would return order to the front yard. Meet...
3 Hippopoticorn Moon T-Shirt
I want a hippopotamus for Christmas...no, wait. I come from a generation of spoiled, entitled, self-righteous narcissists. I can do better than that. I want three hippopotamuses. And I want them to have pearly white...
/remote-control-crocodile-head-44843.jpg?mode=crop "Remote Control Crocodile Head")
Remote Control Crocodile Head
A remote control crocodile head isn't just the practical joke of the summer. Apparently, it's also a practical toy for keeping pests and their poop out of your ponds and pools. You know, birds. Squirrels. Children...
/life-size-bigfoot-statue-28244.jpg "Life-Size Bigfoot Statue")
Life-Size Bigfoot Statue
It's not so much a Bigfoot sighting as it is a Bigfoot companion for life with this life-size Garden Yeti Statue from Design Toscano. If you thought the 8-1/2-foot-tall garden gnome would increase your home's value and...
Crocobiner Multi-Tool Carabiner
Tsvet doesn't waste any time on an intro waxing poetic about his Crocobiner on the multi-tool's Kickstarter campaign page. Why would he? One look at the EDC crocodile and its list of functions tells me just about everything...
/area-51-5-foot-54709.jpg?mode=crop "Area 51 5-Foot Glow-in-the-Dark Alien Statue")
Area 51 5-Foot Glow-in-the-Dark Alien Statue
This Alien Statue from Area 51 is pretty much life-size (I mean, aliens seem pretty short, right) at 5 feet tall, and glows outer-space-radioactive green in the dark, so it's obviously a choice pick for anyone getting...
Hydro-Ball Wind Spinner
The Hydro-Ball Wind Spinner isn't just a fetching piece of kinetic yard art, it's a Daddy's Little Helper that waters the grass or flower beds so you don't have to...
/good-after-nine-animal-rings-48072.jpg?mode=crop "Good After Nine Animal Rings")
Good After Nine Animal Rings
Didn't get that hippopotamus for Christmas? How about a Happy Hippo Ring instead? Those denied cats, dogs, snakes, cockatoos, koalas, and frog princes, Good After Nine has its finger on the pulse of your disappointment...
Squirrel Tree Climber Garden Statue
Whoa, this Squirrel Tree Climber statue for your garden is so realistic neighbors and passersby are going to take one look and think they're as nuts as the acorns the squirrel has belayed himself up to get. Hand-painted...