Style

Bad Kitty Catsuit

The first thing I noticed about this Bad Kitty Catsuit is that it looks equally hot, and makes me shift equally uncomfortably in my seat, on both thin, tan blondes and busty, red-lipped redheads. I'm still not able to...

Hyperlip Prosthetic Lips

Discontinued

The medical term for the part of the oral mucosa covering the tooth-bearing border of the jaw is is "gingiva." So. Who wants to see some gingiva?! The Hyperlip is a plastic lip ring that fits over your existing kisser...

Upton Handmade Belts

$110 - $130 Upton »

"American leather, Italian tanning, Texan hands." Upton Belts launched its online brand of custom-sized not-accessories just this year. The company hopes men (and women!) who wear their designs will discover they can...

The Ball Lifter (NSFW)

$17 - $22.95 Amazon »

I know what you're thinking: is that a push-up bra...for my balls? The answer is yes. The Ball Lifter was designed to lift and embellish your package without pumps, pills, or other male member enhancement quackery. It's...

CUFF Notification & 911 Smart Bracelet

Discontinued

Give your lady an extra layer of connectivity and safety when she's on her own...and, OK, feel a little better walking through a sketch area yourself when the two of you are together...with CUFF jewelry. The CUFF bracelet...

Nano-b Silver, Gold & Charcoal Toothbrushes

$11.50 - $13.25 Amazon »

After an unfortunate experiment with foil wrapping paper I was told I cannot pull off gold teeth. However, having used a Nano-b for about a week now, I am pretty certain I can pull off a gold toothbrush. Or rather, the...

ZIIIRO Celeste Watch

Discontinued

The ZIIIRO Celeste Watch looks like it grew up in MoMA. Artsy and minimalist, the design plays off of a pair of transparent colored discs that overlap both to create a small spectrum of shades and colors, and to tell...

Devon Star Wars Watch

$28,500 Devon »

You like Star Wars. But how much do you like Star Wars? Like, put a dollar amount on it. Go ahead, take a second and do it...

Witzman Retro Canvas Duffel Bag

Sold Out Amazon »

In the hand, over the shoulder, across the body, on the back...nothing but no sweat. The Witzman canvas duffel bag is both pleasing to the retro eye, and versatile in its portability. Made of cotton canvas and polyurethane...

Boo-Boos Gory Bandages

I'll see your kiss it and make it better and raise you a gasp, gag, and vomit up my corn dog and curly fries. Designer, inventor, and gore master Sherwood Forlee makes Boo-Boos, adhesive bandages that will help make your...

ThinOPTICS - Reading Glasses on Your Phone

$20.96 Amazon »

The only thing worse than needing reading glasses is not having reading glasses when you need them. ThinOPTICS has designed a simple way to ensure your glasses are always on hand that doesn't consume a ton of space, weigh...

DRIVE Watch

DRIVE is a watch for a MAN. In fact, I'm not sure timepieces get more MAN than Gus Petrikas' design concept. I could see this watch at home on the wrist of anyone from James Bond to LeBron James, Hugh Jackman to Captain...

5.11 Tactical Overwatch Carry On

Sold Out Amazon »

What's your day looking like? Office or forest? Typing or pulling the trigger? 5.11 Tactical's Overwatch Carry On bag was designed to carry your suit. And when you don't need your suit, it will wrap up and secure your...

Activated Charcoal Liquid Soap

$21 Latika »

Activated charcoal. You can eat it in hellfire burgers. You can brush your teeth with it for impurity removal and, ironically, whitening power. You can swallow it in pill form to alleviate hangovers and food

Tesla Watch

Discontinued

Induction motors, X-ray experimentation, the world's first RC boat. Nikola Tesla's contributions to the world were numerous and thrilling during his nearly 6 decades of scientific pursuit in New York. So it's strange...

EnChroma Color Blindness Glasses

$339.95 - $439.95 EnChroma »

As as dude named Ethan demonstrates in the above video, seeing colors for the first time ever is an experience a lot like seeing them for the first time ever while on hallucinogenic drugs. Stirring. Awe-inspiring. Life-changing...

Filson Dry Duffel Bag

Sold Out Amazon »

If you hate the thought of exposing your gear to water, dust, sand, and zippers then Filson's dry duffel might be the bag for you. The pictured mid-size version is made of polyester coated in vinyl for complete weather...

Colita De Rana Bug-Repellent Aloe

If you have a sunburn so bad it hurts to blink, that sucks. If you have a sunburn so bad it hurts to blink, and then you get bitten up by mosquitos such that even though several areas of your body are at Level 8 pain...

Flexi Freeze Ice Vest

Sold Out Amazon »

My ex-girlfriend Karen doesn't need a Flexi Freeze cooling vest because the ice in her heart is strong enough to chill her entire chest cavity, but if you do a lot of manual labor, have to wear a heavy costume, or are...

Maqoo Cooling Underwear

$45 Maqoo »

They're not quite as...vented...as a pair of Manties, but Maqoo still believes their new linen blend of underwear will be the coolest your boys will ever cradle. At least from a degrees Fahrenheit point of view. Aesthetically...

Manties Men's Lace Boxers

$31.19 Firebox.com »

Last month this a-hole at my office left a box of Edible Anus chocolates on my desk with a note that said, "I saw these and thought of your face." Now everyone at work calls me Buttmuncher. Like we're 12! So for next...

RipFix Hand Tear Repair

$15.75 Amazon »

Well here's one downside to physical activity: nasty, torn-up palms. Check this out. If you can do it without gagging. Large chunks of skin ripped violently from a dude's hands in the name of "working out?" I hope he...

Slim Water Repellent Laptop Backpack

Sold Out Amazon »

Backpacks usually remind me of school. Ugh. One thing I do not miss is school. Granted, work is a buzzkill too. The grind of the rat race, my incredibly taxing job of trolling the Internet for stuff to spend money on...

Voodoo Tactical Men's Mojo Load-Out Bag

$102.80 - $143.30 Amazon »

Eleven different exterior pouches, with enough PALS webbing to attach, like, 87 more. And a set of backpack straps for lugging the duffel along your vertebrae. Seems like Voodoo Tactical's Mojo Load-Out Bag is good news...